Site throws light on teen text argot

gud idea f U' Ovr 30


It's long been accepted at Vulture Central that the English language is going to the dogs. Indeed, many Reg hacks have made significant contribution to this process of decay with their "fluid" spelling and grammatical skills.

But it is the nation's youth who must shoulder much of the blame. Armed with their favoured weapon of linguistic destruction - the mobile phone - they have reduced our beloved tongue to a series of abbreviations, acronyms and emoticons meaningless to anyone over 25. Until now.

Cue breathless press release from www.transl8it.com, a Canadian outfit dedicated to putting the world of teen argot at your fingertips. According to Daniel Wilton, president of transl8it!: "This new truncated lingo is the hottest thing for today's pop-culture."

Right on, Daddy-o, so give me the inside jive:

The transL8it! website (www.transL8it.com) allows visitors to take SMS texting messages that start as English and convert them to SMS lingo or visa [sic] versa. Anyone with an internet connection can now make sense of texting lingo, acronyms, and emoticons, while optimizing space in their messaging.

Ah, I see. All well and good. Let's see how it works on the street. We asked one acne-crippled suburban teenager to run a typical Saturday evening's SMS through the translator. These are the results:

  • Hello there sexy = LO der sexC

  • Would you like to accompany me to the shopping centre for a candlelit dinner? = wud U lIk 2 accompany me 2 d shopping centre 4 a candlelit dinr?

  • Two happy meals please = 2 :-) meals pls

  • Yes, I'd like to see the soft drinks list = yS, I'd lIk 2 c d soft _/z list

  • Are you on the pill? = R U on d pill?

Impressive stuff, but what's in it for us old timers? Well, if you're increasingly irritated by unsolicited advertising text messages from your mobile network, try this:

  • Hello, if you SMS spam me again I'm going to come round there and break your legs = LO, f U SMS spam me again I'm goin 2 cum round der & break yor legs.

Yup, works for me. ®


Other stories you might like

  • Experts: AI should be recognized as inventors in patent law
    Plus: Police release deepfake of murdered teen in cold case, and more

    In-brief Governments around the world should pass intellectual property laws that grant rights to AI systems, two academics at the University of New South Wales in Australia argued.

    Alexandra George, and Toby Walsh, professors of law and AI, respectively, believe failing to recognize machines as inventors could have long-lasting impacts on economies and societies. 

    "If courts and governments decide that AI-made inventions cannot be patented, the implications could be huge," they wrote in a comment article published in Nature. "Funders and businesses would be less incentivized to pursue useful research using AI inventors when a return on their investment could be limited. Society could miss out on the development of worthwhile and life-saving inventions."

    Continue reading
  • Declassified and released: More secret files on US govt's emergency doomsday powers
    Nuke incoming? Quick break out the plans for rationing, censorship, property seizures, and more

    More papers describing the orders and messages the US President can issue in the event of apocalyptic crises, such as a devastating nuclear attack, have been declassified and released for all to see.

    These government files are part of a larger collection of records that discuss the nature, reach, and use of secret Presidential Emergency Action Documents: these are executive orders, announcements, and statements to Congress that are all ready to sign and send out as soon as a doomsday scenario occurs. PEADs are supposed to give America's commander-in-chief immediate extraordinary powers to overcome extraordinary events.

    PEADs have never been declassified or revealed before. They remain hush-hush, and their exact details are not publicly known.

    Continue reading
  • Stolen university credentials up for sale by Russian crooks, FBI warns
    Forget dark-web souks, thousands of these are already being traded on public bazaars

    Russian crooks are selling network credentials and virtual private network access for a "multitude" of US universities and colleges on criminal marketplaces, according to the FBI.

    According to a warning issued on Thursday, these stolen credentials sell for thousands of dollars on both dark web and public internet forums, and could lead to subsequent cyberattacks against individual employees or the schools themselves.

    "The exposure of usernames and passwords can lead to brute force credential stuffing computer network attacks, whereby attackers attempt logins across various internet sites or exploit them for subsequent cyber attacks as criminal actors take advantage of users recycling the same credentials across multiple accounts, internet sites, and services," the Feds' alert [PDF] said.

    Continue reading

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2022