Iran clamps down on mullets

Chris Waddle cancels Tehran weekend break

As part of its audacious bid to become the first nation to ban absolutely everything, Iran has reportedly taken exception to the infamous mullet, meaning footballing legend Chris Waddle will have to cancel that Tehran weekend break he was planning.

Rudi Voller, too, would be well advised to street clear of the Islamic fashion police, who've ruled the hairstyle offside, along with "ponytails and spikes".

That's according to Catholic Online, which reckons the powers that be have issued a pamphlet to guide men towards a less decadent head of hair. Official Jaleh Khodayar said: "The proposed styles are inspired by Iranians' complexion, culture and religion, and Islamic law."

Quite what the Koran has to say about mullets we know not. The Catholic position on the matter is likewise unclear, although there's no doubt that Peter Stringfellow's famous barnet has more than a touch of the hand of Satan about it. ®