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How d'ya make a JPMorgan banker cry? Ask him questions on Twitter
Banking behemoth cancels Q&A after furious mob descends on hashtag
Twitter trolls have sent a grosse fromage from JPMorgan scuttling back to his ivory tower after hijacking a public question and answer session.
The world was asked to send questions to Jimmy Lee, vice chairman of the bank, using the hashtag #AskJPM.
But a mob of trolls quickly commandeered the session, bombarding Lee with abuse. Noticing the ire, JPMorgan quickly fled off the internet and sobbed into their money-stuffed pillows.
A JPMorgan spokesman later wrote: “#Badidea! Back to the drawing board!”
Many of the accusations are unprintable in any publication which wants to live until the end of the week. In respect to the power of the moneybags firm's lawyers, we've selected a few of the less defamatory tweets:
— Luke Harder (@Anonyphant) November 14, 2013
#AskJPM Does this tutu look nice on me? Also why aren't you in jail yet? /me pirouettes— Anonymous (@AnonyOps) November 14, 2013
Gold-plated boxers or gold-plated briefs? #AskJPM— Dustin M. Slaughter (@DustinSlaughter) November 14, 2013
#AskJPM Is it true that, while you don't always spit on poor people, when you do, you have perfect aim?— Charlotte (@LoftusCharlotte) November 13, 2013
JPMorgan are not the first to fall foul of trolls. Rival football fans once commandeered an Arsenal Q&A to vent their collective spleen. One user wrote: "Is it true that manager Arsène Wenger’s coat is a tribute to his favourite book, The Very Hungry Caterpillar?"
A similar thing happened to British Gas, infamous in Blighty for making swingeing price increases every winter. One wag wrote: "Which items of furniture do you, in your humble opinion, think people should burn first this winter?" ®