It's clapped-out and so under-specced that sending even the briefest of tweets is impossible.
But that won't stop some super rich collector from paying $600,000 for an Apple-1 computer signed by the Cupertino Godhead himself, Steve Jobs.
The pre-Mac was built in Jobs' garage before being sold to Charles Ricketts. According to Christie's, the auction house arranging the sale, it is the only known computer to be sold from the future fruity fuhrer's family home in Los Altos, California.
It is currently owned by Robert Luther, a collector from Virginia. He bought the expensive machine during 2004 at a police auction, before launching a Kickstarter appeal to find out more about its provenance.
If you're wondering why anyone would pay such a massive sum for a hopelessly out-of-date computer, reflect on this statement by Andrew McVinish, Christie's director of decorative arts.
"It all started with the Apple-1 and with this particular machine," he said.
"When you see a child playing with an iPad or iPhone, not too many people know that it all started with the Apple-1. So to be able to own a machine that started the digital revolution is a very powerful attraction." ®