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Musk: 'It's BS for ex-Vulture to claim I forced employee to miss sprog's birth'

Plus: Zuck's NOT trying to suck in everything

QuoTW This week we found a quadruple quasar, fought with Vladimir Putin and made short work of our combination locks.

But what were the best quotes, you may wonder?

Republican presidential hopeful and brother of Dubya, Jeb Bush, thinks we should replace our health insurance plans with Sir Jony's shiny time piece.

Speaking in Arizona, the Jebster pointed to his wristjob and said:

On this device in five years will be applications that will allow me to manage my healthcare in ways that, five years ago, were not even possible.

Jeb, it may cost as much as a heart surgery but we don't think Apple chief Tim Cook meant for the Watch to replace your doctor any time soon.

Let's continue on up the road to Redmond, where Microsoft made clear its policy on running pirated or "Non-Genuine" copies of Windows. That policy being that you can't upgrade to Windows 10 if you're running a knock-off copy.

Well, actually, you can.

Or can you?

Let's ask Microsoft VP Terry Myerson for a crystal clear response:

In partnership with some of our valued OEM partners [sic], we are planning very attractive Windows 10 upgrade offers for their customers running one of their older devices in a Non-Genuine state.

Thanks for that, Terry. It all makes sense now. YEAH.

Over to the airport, where United Airlines thinks you should do some security work for it, free of charge. The airline has launched a bug bounty program for its web portal, but instead of just paying researchers, United would rather give out airline miles. United said:

We believe that this program will further bolster our security and allow us to continue to provide excellent service. If you think you have discovered a potential bug that affects our websites, apps and/or online portals, please let us know. If the submission meets our requirements, we'll gladly reward you for your time and effort.

Sure, being able to buy food and pay bills is nice and all, but wouldn't you security peeps rather get a seat upgrade on the red-eye from Toledo to Newark?

If you're not unnerved enough by the thought that your airline is paying its security bods in headphones and tiny bags of peanuts, how about the possibility of killer parakeets taking over your neighbourhood?

Researchers have warned of the looming menace posed by an invasive flock of parakeets sweeping through Europe and the Americas:

The parakeets that have invaded Europe and North America over the last forty to fifty years, creating massive nests in many urban areas, seem to have originated from the same small geographical area in South America. In addition, the invasive populations are genetically identical.

Who knows, perhaps it's time for a logo update at El Reg ...

Facebook played a blinder this week, by scooping out the eyeballs of newspaper readers from esteemed publications such as the New York Times, Bild and some other rag going by the name of BuzzFeed.

But the free content ad network was keen to promise that ickle boydroid Mark Zuckerberg & Co were not playing an evil game with publishers.

It rolled out chief product chief Chris Cox chiefly to talk about the product. He said:

We’re not trying to go, like, suck in and devour everything.

Of course not. It just wants to do the tango with your optic nerves, dear readers. Not sinister at all. Nope.

Meanwhile, over on Planet Elon Musk, we all learned that the man may be a lot of things but he's not heartless.

Sure, he may expect his staff to work long hours and toil at HQ six days a week but he gets real angry when people (Yes, we're looking at you, ex-Vulture Mister Ashlee Vance Esq.) suggest that he once chewed out an employee for taking time off to see their sprog being born. The billionaire biz baron boomed his denial the same way all rational people do ... on Twitter.

The Tesla tycoon said:

It is total BS & hurtful to claim that I told a guy to miss his child's birth just to attend a company meeting. I would never do that.

Enjoy your weekend. Unless you work at Tesla, in which case you'd better close this up before Mr Musk catches you slacking off. Again. ®

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