Nobody expects... a surprise haemorrhoid operation

Our chief weapon is: unquestioningly dropping trou

Decades of authoritarian one party rule have perhaps reduced one man's ability to question authority as a Chinese bloke awaiting the birth of his child was erroneously whisked in for a haemorrhoidectomy.

Doctors at Shenyang Hunnan Xinqu Hospital mistook Mr Wang for another chap with a bad case of the pink grapes and whisked him into the operating theatre, according to a report in Bandao City News.

Wang thought he was going to help his wife with the delivery of their child but then medics asked him to drop his pants and jump onto the operating table.

“It felt strange, and I asked why,” he was reporting as saying. “They just said, “Just do what we tell you”. One operation later and the 29-year-old gent was rid of the piles he didn’t know he had.

“When I was on the operating table I heard a baby crying and I was very happy, and I wanted to hold it,” he reportedly told the Chinese Business Morning View. “But I couldn’t move because I started to feel pain.”

Accordingly, the hospital offered Wang 5,000 yuan (£580) for the butt nugget expulsion. It said the blunder “should be shouldered by both parties, since Mr Wang is a grown man”.

“The patient who was supposed to have the operation had completed all the paperwork needed for this surgery,” the hospital spokesman said to Bando City News.

Alls well that ends well and Mr Wang’s wife gave birth to a baby via Caesarian section, but the booty bumps episode again highlighted the cultural differences toward officials in China.

Earlier this week it emerged that a Chinese tourist had had his wallet stolen while in Germany and following a series of twists and turns, ended up spending a fortnight in a hostel for asylum seekers.

The backpacker spoke neither German nor English, and was picked up by the Red Cross, then underwent a medical check and had his fingerprints taken. He had allowed German officials to seize his passport and visa, before he was handed standard papers refugees are given on arriving in Germany.

The unnamed man then continued his tour of the continent but was quoted as saying he expected the region to be different. ®

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