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Public masturbation not a crime declares Italy’s top court

Though tossing more than coins in the Trevi fountain could still merit a fine

A 61-year-old Italian convicted of public masturbation has had the threat of hard time lifted, after judges declared the dirty old goat’s favoured pastime isn’t actually a crime in the country.

The case arose after sexagenarian Pietro L was nabbed “pulling his member” and practising “autoeroticism” in front of female students at the University of Catania last May, according to local reports.

He was initially slapped with a three month prison sentence, however, the stint of porridge was converted into a fine of €3,420 (£2,891).

However, Peter L clearly thought his al fresco onanism didn’t merit a fine, and appealed to a higher power, in the form of the country’s Supreme Court. The members of the Supreme Court decided that Pietro L’s activity had actually been decriminalised under 2015’s Legislative Decree 8, though it was still punishable by a fine.

Consequently, the initial sentence was tossed out. However, despite the fact that public cannolo caressing is no longer a crime in Italy, it is still punishable by a fine - of between five and thirty thousand.

Pervy Pietro is best advised to count his blessings. In the UK, he could be hit with a two-week spell in chokey, according to The Independent, though Sweden takes a more lenient line on public masturbation, as long it isn’t directed at anyone in particular.

The US takes a much firmer hand though, with one Telly Shadell Corey immediately booked into jail after being arrested for indecent exposure having spent three hours solid masturbating on a Megabus in Iowa. Thank heavens it wasn’t a Greyhound. ®

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