Half-metre pizza or an upgrade from Windows 7? We know what we'd choose

Cheese, pepperoni, and a generous topping of bork

Bork!Bork!Bork! Today's bork comes from the fine Croatian town of Opatija, located on the coast and reminding us of those happy days when overseas holiday were allowed.

Not so for our reader, who insisted he was in the locale for purely work purposes, and fancied an after-hours snack.

"This restaurant's speciality is a '1/2 metre long pizza'," he explained. "Very good quality, but a challenge."

The ordering system is also a challenge. There is a touchscreen ("which most people ignored, preferring to go to the person in the window") to take a customer's order while another screen shows a punter's place in the queue.

Not queued, it appears, was an update to Windows 7 – unless the proprietor of the eatery fancied popping on the screen as a desktop prank.

Click to enlarge

Sadly any helpful information is hidden, although perhaps a click on what we think might be a minimised Internet Explorer session would help? And no, we can't believe we used "help" and "Internet Explorer" in the same sentence either, particularly without slipping the words "beyond" and "is never any" in somewhere.

We suspect Microsoft would argue that "helpful" means making it as clear as can be that it really is time to move on from Windows 7. It would also be ever so pleased to see the back of its once-flagship website renderer, Internet Explorer.

Still, as for Romero's Bread and Burger bar, it seems a topping of bork is on the menu. And the cause of the blurry pictures? Our reader told us there had been "inebriated locals in the vicinity" and so rather than advise the restaurant owner of the pros and cons of a move to Windows 10 or Linux, he opted to make a rapid and discreet escape. Hopefully with 50 centimetres of pizza tucked under his arm. ®