28th July 2008 Archive • The Register

Scre-EE-m if you wanna go faster: BT's mobile network reigns supreme in UK-wide speed and latency tests

Meet the ‘DPU’ – accelerated network cards designed to go where CPUs and GPUs can’t be bothered

Join us in the cloud, breathes Microsoft as it gifts Azure SQL Managed Instance customers a surprise horsepower boost

Won't duke, duke, duke the URLs: AWS backtracks on plans to block old-style S3 paths

Brexit travel permits designed to avoid 7,000-lorry jams come January depend on software that won't be finished till April

Key API management platform for UK public sector scrapped: DWP ends £5m MuleSoft project

HubSpot must prove core sales features to be taken seriously in enterprise CRM market

Epic, Spotify, ProtonMail and pals rise up as one against Apple's 30% cut, call for end to Cupertino-style markets

Error-bnb: Techies scramble to fix Airbnb website bug that let strangers read each others' account messages

IT guy whose job was to stop ex-staff running amok on the network is jailed for running amok on the network

Microsoft claims to love open source – this alleged leak of Windows XP code is probably not what it had in mind, tho

Spain's highway agency is monitoring speeding hotspots using bulk phone location data

Not Particularly Mortifying: IEEE eggheads probe npm registry, say JavaScript libs not as insecure as feared

Microservices guru says think serverless, not Kubernetes: You don't want to manage 'a towering edifice of stuff'

Imagine working for GitHub and writing a command-line interface for the platform, then GitHub makes an 'official' one

Anglian Water fishes for on-trend laundry list – including low-code work – in £24m trawl

Alphabet promises to no longer bung tens of millions of dollars to alleged sex pest execs who quit mid-probe

Looking for a new tech job? Just browsing? This week's list includes roles for devs, engineers, and Perl maestros

'Robbery, economic plunder, victim of larcenous cronyism and a heist'

WeWork Won’tWork in China, at least not as majority owner

Sweetheart tax deal appeal: European Commission takes €13bn Apple state aid claim to the EU's highest court

Help! My printer won't print no matter how much I shout at it!

Hootsuite melts ICE deal after staff revolt: CEO vows not to divide biz like agents divided families at the US border

Facebook is the internet's cigarette: Addictive and laced with nasty stuff – 'shocking images, graphic videos, headlines that incite outrage'

Geek's Guide

FYI: Mind how you go. We're more or less oblivious to 75% of junk in geosynchronous orbits around Earth

Bennu Jerry's, anyone? OSIRIS-REx probe to attempt 3 scoops of asteroid next month before bringing samples home

NASA's hefty Martian rover will use an AI brain on a robot arm to map out signs of ancient life on Red Planet

Moonshot: Making spaceships with Microsoft's refreshed HoloLens 2 nerd goggles

First they came for chess, then Go... and now, oh for crying out loud, AI systems can beat us at curling

SharePoint Syntex: Microsoft rolls out AI that automatically categorises documents

All those ‘teleworking is the new normal’ predictions? Not so much, say bosses

It's powered by a mega-corp AI, it has a Liquid Mode, but it's not a T-1000. It's Adobe's PDF auto-reflow for mobile

Verity Stob

First-world problems: The pumpkin spice latte is here, but the Starbucks loyalty card app has wiped my balance

Can The Register run Crysis Remastered? Yes, but we don't see why you would want to

Onwards! To the airport and adventure! And this rather lachrymose Linux screen

Space. The final frontier. These are the voyages of 'Advanced Night Repair' skin cream helping NASA to commercialise space

28th > July > 2008 Archive

Scre-EE-m if you wanna go faster: BT's mobile network reigns supreme in UK-wide speed and latency tests

Meet the ‘DPU’ – accelerated network cards designed to go where CPUs and GPUs can’t be bothered

Join us in the cloud, breathes Microsoft as it gifts Azure SQL Managed Instance customers a surprise horsepower boost

Won't duke, duke, duke the URLs: AWS backtracks on plans to block old-style S3 paths

Brexit travel permits designed to avoid 7,000-lorry jams come January depend on software that won't be finished till April

Key API management platform for UK public sector scrapped: DWP ends £5m MuleSoft project

HubSpot must prove core sales features to be taken seriously in enterprise CRM market

Epic, Spotify, ProtonMail and pals rise up as one against Apple's 30% cut, call for end to Cupertino-style markets

Error-bnb: Techies scramble to fix Airbnb website bug that let strangers read each others' account messages

IT guy whose job was to stop ex-staff running amok on the network is jailed for running amok on the network

Microsoft claims to love open source – this alleged leak of Windows XP code is probably not what it had in mind, tho

Spain's highway agency is monitoring speeding hotspots using bulk phone location data

Not Particularly Mortifying: IEEE eggheads probe npm registry, say JavaScript libs not as insecure as feared

Microservices guru says think serverless, not Kubernetes: You don't want to manage 'a towering edifice of stuff'

Imagine working for GitHub and writing a command-line interface for the platform, then GitHub makes an 'official' one

Anglian Water fishes for on-trend laundry list – including low-code work – in £24m trawl

Alphabet promises to no longer bung tens of millions of dollars to alleged sex pest execs who quit mid-probe

Looking for a new tech job? Just browsing? This week's list includes roles for devs, engineers, and Perl maestros

'Robbery, economic plunder, victim of larcenous cronyism and a heist'

WeWork Won’tWork in China, at least not as majority owner

Sweetheart tax deal appeal: European Commission takes €13bn Apple state aid claim to the EU's highest court

Help! My printer won't print no matter how much I shout at it!

Hootsuite melts ICE deal after staff revolt: CEO vows not to divide biz like agents divided families at the US border

Facebook is the internet's cigarette: Addictive and laced with nasty stuff – 'shocking images, graphic videos, headlines that incite outrage'

FYI: Mind how you go. We're more or less oblivious to 75% of junk in geosynchronous orbits around Earth

Bennu Jerry's, anyone? OSIRIS-REx probe to attempt 3 scoops of asteroid next month before bringing samples home

NASA's hefty Martian rover will use an AI brain on a robot arm to map out signs of ancient life on Red Planet

Moonshot: Making spaceships with Microsoft's refreshed HoloLens 2 nerd goggles

First they came for chess, then Go... and now, oh for crying out loud, AI systems can beat us at curling

SharePoint Syntex: Microsoft rolls out AI that automatically categorises documents

All those ‘teleworking is the new normal’ predictions? Not so much, say bosses

It's powered by a mega-corp AI, it has a Liquid Mode, but it's not a T-1000. It's Adobe's PDF auto-reflow for mobile

First-world problems: The pumpkin spice latte is here, but the Starbucks loyalty card app has wiped my balance

Can The Register run Crysis Remastered? Yes, but we don't see why you would want to

Onwards! To the airport and adventure! And this rather lachrymose Linux screen

Space. The final frontier. These are the voyages of 'Advanced Night Repair' skin cream helping NASA to commercialise space

28th > July > 2008 Archive

Sun may or may not be about to obliterate Oracle and Microsoft

Focus plus excitement: Michael Dell talks turnarounds

Chinese takeaway biodiesel man in garage explosion horror

DIY: Replace your iPhone 3G's scratched screen

Motorola splits business into three parts

Super-skinny storage

IBM throws arms around ILOG

Oops - SF prosecutors put city passwords on public record

Aussie school goes high-tech

Brits terrified of online fraud, but want magic cars, says BT

Toshiba's handy camcorder

Home Office to order fingerprinting of air passengers

Screwgle™ - Google's new ad revenue model

US man cuffed for executing lawnmower

Sophos bids €217m for data loss firm

Celebrity publicist develops mathematical 'fame formula'

FCC censures Comcast for doing its job

Nokia 6220 Classic candybar phone

Microsoft slams 'sensationalist' Vista analysis

Steve Fossett may be alive, investigator claims

Sony unveils EPUB eBook support

SAP defends forced price hike against user anger

Orangutans concoct plant-based soothing balm

CGI furnishes filmstar with fur

Gateway stops selling direct

NASA's robotic moon-dirt grubbing contest is go

Korean loan sharks feed on hacked data

Emirates takes delivery of its first A380 super jumbo

Dud Nvidia GPUs tip up in Dell laptops

The PSP: what's its future?

Microsoft readies XP for One Laptop Per Child computer

Business Objects/SAP bungle leaves users in lurch

Apple is sorry (again) over MobileMe

Rackable clears ICE Cube shipping containers for IBM blades

AT&T kicks Intel's pet WiMAX project

Exploit code targets Mac OS X, iTunes, Java, Winzip...

VMware slashes ESXi price to zero

Site guesses your sex via age-old web flaw

Most Read

Big US election coming up, security is vital and, oh look... a federal agency just got completely pwned for real

Brexit travel permits designed to avoid 7,000-lorry jams come January depend on software that won't be finished till April

IT guy whose job was to stop ex-staff running amok on the network is jailed for running amok on the network

Microsoft claims to love open source – this alleged leak of Windows XP code is probably not what it had in mind, tho