Security Brazilian and Russian cybercrooks collaborating to create more potent threats Borrowed technologies, code obfuscation, and a lot more in their bag of tricks 01 Apr 00:12 | 1
Science Astronomers find first neutron star in Andromeda galaxy Lighthouse in space spotted in years of records 01 Apr 00:29 | 11
Security Flaw found in Lhasa makes for compression confession depression Don't be a .LZA-boy – patch and consider where you decompress 01 Apr 01:54 | 4
Legal India orders 770 million LED light bulbs, prices drop 83 per cent Subsidised bulbs sold for US$1.28, cuts peak load by 2,346 MW 01 Apr 03:03 | 85
Servers Dell joins Java jumpers with updated server admin tool HTML5 FTW in iDRAC 2.30.30.30 01 Apr 03:58 | 6
Black Hat Asia Hacker reveals $40 attack that steals police drones from 2km away No encryption in pro-grade drones: just sniff Wi-Fi and copy signals 01 Apr 05:04 | 19
Bootnotes The Register to publish Mindful Sysadmin adult colouring book The power of 'routed thought' will packetise and harmonise your personal neural network 01 Apr 06:01 | 75
Personal Tech Elon Musk takes wraps off planet-saving Model 3 vapourmobile It's fast! It's shiny! It's smart! And it's not going on sale until late 2017 01 Apr 07:02 | 109
ON-CALL You can't dust-proof a PC with kitchen-grade plastic food wrap There's a reason the lowest quote for a job isn't always the best quote for a job 01 Apr 07:29 | 82
Apple at 40 When Steve Jobs was away, Apple's designers snuck out a penis-shaped remote control The PowerCD's remote did not need a domed, bulbous tip 01 Apr 08:00 | 39
Apple at 40 Holding out for a Jobs: Tim Cook still auditioning for position of Apple god The future is Watch, the future is data, the future is taking on Uncle Sam 01 Apr 08:33 | 25
Something for the Weekend, Sir? Which keys should I press to enable the CockUp feature? Sit in front of this and rotate 01 Apr 09:07 | 118
Apple at 40 Done making the big stuff better? The path to Apple's mid-life crisis IoT, VR, AI... cars? Let the other guy take the hit first 01 Apr 09:39 | 29
Legal Blighty starts pumping out 12-sided quids New retro-styled nugget coming soon to a pocket near you 01 Apr 09:56 | 120
Channel Micron turns $900m profits into a $97m loss. Only took 12 months Fifth straight quarterly revenue decline reverses 11 profitable quarters' trend 01 Apr 10:36 | 3
Software Google tried to be funny, cocked it up, everyone thought it was a bug April Fool! Gmail joke feature pulled after causing mass FUD 01 Apr 11:01 | 73
+Comment Sphere 3D keeps business ship afloat atop sea of red ink Let's have a look at those buoyancy aids 01 Apr 11:16 |
Devops Continuous Lifecycle: The final countdown No foolin', we're running low on tickets 01 Apr 11:25 | 4
Bootnotes Canadian rotter abducts giant Playmobil fireman Ottawa toy store seeks return of popular plastic mascot 01 Apr 11:44 | 19
Channel IBM snaps up small Bluewolf for reported $200m CRM-as-service-acquisition strategy plays out 01 Apr 12:01 | 3
Analysis Is Microsoft's chatty bot platform just Clippy Mark 2? Hello, it looks like you're trying to develop a Strategic Vision. Do you need some help with that? 01 Apr 12:33 | 24
Software Microsoft's DocumentDB lets its MongoDB freak flag fly Get your NoSQL ting on, rascals 01 Apr 13:05 | 1
Channel Huawei on bumper results: We owe growth to ginormous ICT market Worldwide roll-out of 4G didn't hurt, either 01 Apr 13:27 |
Software Jenkins 'fesses up after inadvertently slurping users' usage stats Would Sir prefer the brogues or the Oxfords for giving me a kick in the... 01 Apr 14:07 | 7
On-Prem Call the Cable Guy: Wireless just won't cut it Corporate types need to rethink 01 Apr 14:36 | 43
Apple at 40 Bring on the goats! Apple's cloud failure demands further sacrifice Devices are Apple's thing. Distributed systems are Google's 01 Apr 15:01 | 23
Channel NetApp ain't all that: Flashy figures show HPE left 'em for dust A truer picture emerges thanks to Gartner numbers 01 Apr 15:32 | 17
Channel BlackBerry's still losing millions – but hit its revenue target, finally Android isn't exactly pulling up any trees, though 01 Apr 15:56 | 5
Security PayPal plugs phishing-enabling vulnerability, stumps up $500 To the bug-splatter who found it. Not to you, don't get excited 01 Apr 16:27 | 5
BUILD 2016 Microsoft announces Azure Functions, encrypted cloud storage Incremental improvements more than big headlines, but Azure stays on track 01 Apr 18:08 | 6
On-Prem SEC chair blasts Silicon Valley for its hokey valuations That unicorn look suspiciously like a horse with a rubber horn, says Mary Jo White 01 Apr 18:17 | 26
Networks Frontier rings in Verizon takeover by borking its network Handover doesn't appear to be going particularly well in three US states 01 Apr 18:27 | 4
Science Space archeologist discovers new evidence of Vikings invading America Second settlement spotted by satellite 01 Apr 19:23 | 69
Apple at 40 Apple Fools: Times the House of Jobs went horribly awry Plenty of bumps in the 40-year road for Mac makers 01 Apr 20:34 | 77
April Fool Tay talks back: What made you think you beat me? How Microsoft taught fools to train their future enemy 01 Apr 20:40 | 39
Science Microsoft smells Musk, splashes on 'Mune' space program Data centres under water? Try the icy cold of spaaaace... 01 Apr 21:09 | 23
Legal China enacts 'real name policy' for internet addresses It's like Facebook's only, you know, could land you in jail 01 Apr 21:11 | 20
Networks Egypt unfriended Facebook for Free Basics snoop snub Zuck told to Giza the heck out of here 01 Apr 21:31 | 10
OSes Microsoft lures top Linux exec from Oracle to Redmond Wim Coekaerts' hire another sign of open source push 01 Apr 21:58 | 93
Security US government updates secure email guide for first time in a decade NIST provides 81 pages of practical advice 01 Apr 22:56 | 22
Personal Tech How do you build a cheap iPhone? Use a lot of old parts Teardown finds SE borrows plenty from its ancestors 01 Apr 23:32 | 56
On-Prem Tesla books over $8bn in overnight sales claims Elon Musk But expect long waiting lists 01 Apr 23:40 | 144