Tired techie 'fixed' a server, blamed Microsoft, and got away with it
who, me? If you're too exhausted to think, maybe you shouldn't be doing tech support
On-Prem15 Apr 2024 | 66
Matthew is a copy editor and writer for The Register and its sister titles. He is based in Australia. With more than 25 years of experience in the technology media industry, Matthew has held roles ranging from editor of Australian Macworld and PCMag Australia to editor-at-large.
Windows 95 support chap skipped a step and sent user into Micro-hell
Who, Me? Every byte, and executable, counted when trying to fix Redmond's finest
OSes08 Apr 2024 | 75
You break it, you ... run away and hope somebody else fixes it
Who, Me? Enthusiastic young tech decided to simplify the mainframe, with unexpected results
On-Prem01 Apr 2024 | 62
DBA made ten years of data disappear with one misplaced parameter
Who, Me? Greybeards thought it was clever, making this an educational experience in more ways than one
Databases25 Mar 2024 | 41
Yes, I did just crash that critical app. And you should thank me for having done so
Who, Me? Quick thinking turned poor judgement into genius proactivity
Software18 Mar 2024 | 75
Health system network turned out to be a house of cards – Cisco cards, that is
who, me? Pride came before a fall for techie who thought he knew it all
Networks04 Mar 2024 | 57
If we plug this in without telling anyone, nobody will know we caused the outage
Who, Me? The whole incident could have been avoided by spending some spare change on a fastener
On-Prem26 Feb 2024 | 69
'Crash test dummy' smashed VIP demo by offering a helping hand
Who, Me? Sometimes you can have too many people in the room
On-Prem12 Feb 2024 | 45
Developer's default setting created turbulence in the flight simulator
who, me? What is it? It's an instrument used to train pilots, but that's not important right now
Software05 Feb 2024 | 122
One person's shortcut was another's long road to panic
Who, Me? Clever techie thought of everything – except someone else's stupidity
Storage29 Jan 2024 | 73
Poor communication led to complete lack of communication
Who, Me? Didn't you fix that? Me? I thought you fixed that!
Software22 Jan 2024 | 31
New year, new bug – rivalry between devs led to a deep-code disaster
Who, me? How badly do you want your name in the About box?
Software08 Jan 2024 | 112
PLACEHOLDER ONLY Someone please write witty headline here
Who, Me? Some jokes don't deserve an audience
Software18 Dec 2023 | 119
Enterprising techie took the bumpy road to replacing vintage hardware
Who, Me? Nice ridiculously redundant drive you've got there – what a pity if something …happened to it
Storage11 Dec 2023 | 107
Sysadmin's favorite collection of infallible utilities failed … foully
who, me? Unnecessary 'maintenance' turned into a fragging foul-up
Storage04 Dec 2023 | 57
IT sent the intern to sort out the nasty VP who was too important to bother with backups
Who, Me? Kid escaped from the executive suite without screwing things up
Personal Tech27 Nov 2023 | 90
Why have just one firewall when you can fire all the walls?
Who, Me? 'Support monkey' turned network isolation job into a banana skin
Networks20 Nov 2023 | 88
Bright spark techie knew the drill and used it to install a power line, but couldn't outsmart an odd electrician
Who, Me? Shocking problem turned out to be a frame-up
On-Prem13 Nov 2023 | 111
Shock horror – and there goes the network neighborhood
Who, me? Curious tech learned an important lesson about keeping a grip in tight situations
Offbeat06 Nov 2023 | 124
After nine servers he worked on failed, techie imagined next career as beach vendor
Who, Me? Sadly (?) that idyllic outcome didn't eventuate even after some very risky repairs
Software30 Oct 2023 | 50
That script I wrote three years ago is now doing what? How many times?
Who, Me? Whipping up a RAID repair nearly produced data doom
Storage23 Oct 2023 | 76
One door opens, another one closes, and this one kills a mainframe
Who, Me? The Reg brings you balanced coverage of retro-tech
Systems16 Oct 2023 | 108
Scripted shortcut caused double-click disaster of sysadmin's own making
Who, Me? Tech remembers why those safeguards were there there to start with
Software09 Oct 2023 | 109
Lost your luggage? That's nothing – we just lost your whole flight!
Who, me? Tech's second day on the job nearly saw his high-flying career grounded
Databases02 Oct 2023 | 97
No, no, no! Disco joke hit bum note in the rehab center
who, me? Techie tried to dunk on a co-worker, and found himself absolutely soaking wet
Offbeat25 Sep 2023 | 87
Watt's the worst thing you can do to a datacenter? Failing to RTFM, electrically
Who, me? A subtle change to a vital piece of equipment almost derailed a major project
Systems11 Sep 2023 | 165
Sure, give the new kid and his MCSE power over the AS/400. What could possibly go wrong?
Who, Me? All he did was follow the example of the boss. And fail to foresee obvious consequences
On-Prem04 Sep 2023 | 76
Polishing off a printer with a flourish revealed not to be best practice
Who, Me? Tech's pride in his work fed a hungry mechanical monster
On-Prem28 Aug 2023 | 81
Lesson 1: Keep your mind on the ... why aren't the servers making any noise?
Who, Me? Quest for redundant cables almost resulted in a redundant techie
On-Prem21 Aug 2023 | 86
The price of freedom turned out to be an afternoon of tech panic
Who, Me? It can be so hard to tell one column from another in a spreadsheet. They all look the same
Software14 Aug 2023 | 79
Techie's quick cure for a curious conflict caused a huge headache
Who, Me? A PC is a PC is a PC, and by any other name would not have taken down the intranet
Personal Tech07 Aug 2023 | 77
Nobody would ever work on the live server, right? Not intentionally, anyway
Who, Me? Techie installing an upgrade did everything right. But the user was already wrong
Software31 Jul 2023 | 140
Linux lover consumed a quarter of the network
Who, Me? Penguins are OK with glaciers. Academics not so much
OSes24 Jul 2023 | 130
Network died, hard, during company Christmas party, leaving lone techie to fix it
Who, me? Yippee-ki-yay, other sockets!
Sysadmin Month17 Jul 2023 | 38
Turning a computer off, then on again, never goes wrong. Right?
Who, Me? Health service techie learns what happens when you brute-force a bureaucracy
Systems10 Jul 2023 | 172
Hacking a Foosball table scored an own goal for naughty engineers
Who, Me? Such a blatant offside the manager couldn't see a funny side
Personal Tech03 Jul 2023 | 80
Security? Working servers? Who needs those when you can have a shiny floor?
Who, Me? The root cause was a buffer error – but not the kind of buffer you're thinking of
On-Prem26 Jun 2023 | 119
Data cleanser did its job, but – oopsie! – also doubled customers' bills
Who, Me? As the customers lined up with pitchforks and burning brands, the question in the cleanup meeting was 'Who, me?'
Software19 Jun 2023 | 25
A toast to being in the right place at the right time
who, me? Techie went to investigate mysterious network dropouts, when the solution popped up
On-Prem12 Jun 2023 | 152
Fed up with slammed servers, IT replaced iTunes backups with a cow of a file
who, me? Pigs might fly before youngsters listened to IT instructions – so the IT manager made sure chickens came home to roost
Personal Tech05 Jun 2023 | 93
Seriously, boss? You want that stupid password? OK, you get that stupid password
Who, Me? Fed-up techie wields the magic of malicious compliance on his way out the door
Offbeat29 May 2023 | 100
Rigorous dev courageously lied about exec's NSFW printouts – and survived long enough to quit with dignity
Who, Me? Log files don't lie and in this case one nasty incident spoke to a far deeper malaise
Security22 May 2023 | 86
An important system on project [REDACTED] was all [REDACTED] up
Who Me? Luckily, [REDACTED] was there to save the day
Security15 May 2023 | 45
Owner of 'magic spreadsheet' tried to stay in the Lotus position until forced to Excel
who, me? Sometimes legacy systems must be preserved to safeguard a vital function. This was not one of those times
Software08 May 2023 | 124
Your security failure was so bad we have to close the company … NOT!
Who, Me? There are pranks, and savage pranks, and this prank when the CTO and HR ganged up on a very stressed techie
Security01 May 2023 | 48
Support chap put PC into 'drying mode' and users believed it was real
Who, Me? Who annoys auditors? It's like picking on alligators – it won't end well
Personal Tech24 Apr 2023 | 83
Pager hack faxed things up properly, again, and again, and again
Who, Me? Where else can you read a story that starts with a Wang hack and ends with a wedding?
Offbeat10 Apr 2023 | 81
Defunct comms link connected to nothing at a fire station – for 15 years
Who, Me? Realization they'd burned money for ages led to smoldering solution rather than angry conflagration
Networks03 Apr 2023 | 131
Botched migration resulted in a great deal: One for the price of two
Who Me? Moving premises can have all manner of hidden traps. Here's one to watch for
Networks27 Mar 2023 | 99
IT phone home: How to run up a $20K bill in two days and get away with it by blaming Cisco
Who, Me? Badly configured routers ended up costing a bundle
Networks20 Mar 2023 | 141
Don't worry, that system's not actually active – oh, wait …
who, me? Fat-fingered admin escaped because the last false alarm was caused by a frozen pizza and a toaster oven
On-Prem06 Mar 2023 | 262
Backup tech felt the need – the need for speed. And pastries and Tomb Raider
Who, Me? Ignoring the manual led to near-failure of mission to escape with precious pile of verified DVDs
Storage27 Feb 2023 | 92
A tip for content filter evaluators: erase the list of sites you tested, don't share them on 100 PCs
Who, Me? The sysadmin who made this mistake just barely survived the NSFW backlash
Software20 Feb 2023 | 182
Learn the art of malicious compliance: doing exactly what you were asked, even when it's wrong
Who, Me? Smart-alec worker found a way to avoid nasty, boring jobs – by doing what he was told
Security13 Feb 2023 | 210
Eager young tearaway almost ruined Christmas with printer paper
Who, Me? In the age of tractor-fed printers and perforated paper, telling a junior to tear it up was close to negligence
On-Prem06 Feb 2023 | 99
Shag pile PC earned techies a carpeting from HR
Who, Me? Thankfully a veep with a sense of humor pulled the rug out
Personal Tech30 Jan 2023 | 48
Dear Stupid, I write with news I did not check the content of the [Name] field before sending this letter
Who, Me? This is what happens when database field names are changed without proper documentation
Software23 Jan 2023 | 104
Mixing an invisible laser and a fire alarm made for a disastrous demo
Who, Me? Dark deeds are no way to close a deal
Science09 Jan 2023 | 61
Meet the merry pranksters who keep the workplace interesting, if not productive
Who, Me? What to do with the boss who refuses to answer the phone? Or wants a bigger cubicle? Revenge, that's what
On-Prem26 Dec 2022 | 91
When we asked how you crashed the system we wanted an explanation not a demonstration
Who, Me? One dumb downtime-inducing panic is survivable. The second is a career-killer
Offbeat19 Dec 2022 | 110
Biting the hand that feeds IT
