BOfH

BOfH

What is BOFH?

The BOFH is the Bastard Operator From Hell, a fictional rogue system administrator who stars in a long-running series created by Simon Travaglia.

The BOFH is devious, insolent, and hilarious. His sidekick-slash-assistant is the Pimply-Faced Youth (PFY), and together they outmaneuver clueless bosses and thwart whatever nonsense their users are trying to pull. The setting is a typical corporate IT department. If you can't sympathize with the BOFH, you just don't get IT.

BOFH stories span multiple episodes, each of which are published every other Friday, or so we hope. You can find our complete BOFH archive below.

BOFH: When the Sun rises in the West and sets in the East, only then will the UPS cease to supply uninterrupted voltage

Episode 8 Until that time, if it ain't broke … oh god, someone call the ambulance

BOFH18 Jun 2021 | 98

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What is BOFH?

BOFH: Get me a new data file or your manager finds out exactly what you think of him

BOFH: Ah. Company-branded merch. So much better than a bonus

BOFH takes a visit to retro computing land

BOFH: We send a user to visit Kelvin – Keeper of the Batteries

BOFH: The Board members are looking very ill these days

BOFH: I care a lot ... about onion bhajis

BROADER TOPICS

BOFH: The PFY has won an award … for outstanding service?

BOFH: Generating a report the Director can show the Board – THIS is what AI was made for

BOFH and the case of the Zoom call that never was

BOFH: It's 4ft tall, heavyset, has optional fax. No they didn't take the toner!

BOFH and the office security access upgrade

BOFH: Come back to the office. Your hotdesk is nice and warm

BOFH: We're an industry leader … in employing idiot managers

BOFH: Don't be nervous, Mr Consultant. Come right this way …

BOFH: I know of a small biz that could deliver nothing for a fraction of the cost

BOFH: The Boss has a new watch – move readiness to DEFCON 2

BOFH: You want presentation layer, but we're physical layer

BOFH: It's Friday, it's time to RTFM

BOFH and the case of the disappearing teaspoons

BOFH: Who us? Sysadmins? Spend time with other departments?

BOFH: Selling the boss on a crypto startup

BOFH: Would I lie to you, Boss?

BOFH: HR's gold mine gambit – they get the gold and we get the shaft

BOFH: Tech helps HR investigate the Boss's devices

BOFH: Where do you think you are going with that toner cartridge?

BOFH: You'll have to really trust me on this team-building exercise

BOFH: Something's consuming 40% of UPS capacity – and it's coming from the beancounters' office

BOFH: The evil guide to upgrading switches

BOFH: Putting the gross in gross insubordination

BOFH: Gaming rig for your home office? Yeah right

BOFH: All hail the job cuts consultant

BOFH: The Geek's Countergambit – outwitted at an electronics store

BOFH: On Wednesdays, we wear gloves

BOFH: What a beautiful classic car. Shame if anything were to happen to it

BOFH: The vengeance bus is coming, and everybody's jumping. An Xmas bonus hits me…

BOFH: Time to put the Pretty Dumb F in PDF reader

BOFH: What if International Bad Actors designed the vaccine to make us watch more Steven Seagal movies?

BOFH: You drive me crazy... and I can't help myself

BOFH: So you want to have your computer switched out for something faster? It's time to learn from the master

BOFH: You. Wouldn't. Put. A. Test. Machine. Into. Production. Without. Telling. Us.

BOFH: You'll find there's a company asset tag right here, underneath the monstrously heavy arcade machine

BOFH: Pass the sugar, Asmodeus, and let the meeting of the Fellowship of Bastards … commence

BOFH: 'What's an NFT?' the Boss asks. In this case, 'not financially thoughtful'

BOFH: They say you either love it or you hate it. We can confirm you're going to hate it

BOFH: You say goodbye and I say halon

BOFH: But soft! What light through yonder filing cabinet breaks?

BOFH: Where there is darkness, let there be a light

BOFH: Here in my car I feel safest of all. I can listen to you ... It keeps me stable for days

BOFH: Oh for Pete’s sake. Don’t make a spectacle of yourself

BOFH: When the Sun rises in the West and sets in the East, only then will the UPS cease to supply uninterrupted voltage

BOFH: Despite the extremely hazardous staircase, our IT insurance agreement is at an all-time low. Can't think why

BOFH: I'm so pleased to be on the call, Boss. No, of course this isn't a recording

BOFH: But we think the UK tax authorities would be VERY interested in how we used COVID support packages

BOFH: Postman BOFH's Special Delivery Service

BOFH: Bullying? Not on my watch! (It's a Rolex)

BOFH: 7 jars of Marmite, a laptop and a good time

BOFH: Are you a druid? Legally, you have to tell me if you're a druid

BOFH: Time for the MMOCC. You know, the Massively Moronic Online Christmas Call

BOFH: Switch off the building? Great idea, Boss

BOFH: You might want to sit down for this. Oh, right, you can't. Listen carefully: THIS IS NOT AN IT PROBLEM!

BOFH: Rome, I have been thy soldier 40 years... give me a staff of honour for mine age

BOFH: Will the last one out switch off the printer?

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