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And look, your COVID pass is all melted...
21 Jan 2022 10:32 | 57
BOFH: The vengeance bus is coming, and everybody's jumping. An Xmas bonus hits me…
… and Turing's going to miss me …
24 Dec 2021 11:40 | 58
BOFH: Time to put the Pretty Dumb F in PDF reader
Thanks for the support. Oh … that's us, is it?
10 Dec 2021 09:15 | 68
BOFH: You drive me crazy... and I can't help myself
Service provider? You sure about that second bit?
12 Nov 2021 09:15 | 102
BOFH: You. Wouldn't. Put. A. Test. Machine. Into. Production. Without. Telling. Us.
Right, Mr Beancounter?
08 Oct 2021 09:15 | 159
BOFH: Pass the sugar, Asmodeus, and let the meeting of the Fellowship of Bastards … commence
Stacy? Stacy of the industry-wide Crazy Frog ringtone VoIP software update? Good work
10 Sep 2021 11:30 | 70
BOFH: They say you either love it or you hate it. We can confirm you're going to hate it
So what you're saying is you updated the new machines from the network – the infected network
30 Jul 2021 08:30 | 114
BOFH: You say goodbye and I say halon
I say 'Yes', Boss says 'No'. Boss says 'Stop' … and I say 'Go, go, go!'
23 Jul 2021 10:46 | 86
BOFH: But soft! What light through yonder filing cabinet breaks?
It is green, and BOFH is not the one. It's only a, er, miner problem …
16 Jul 2021 09:18 | 49
BOFH: Where there is darkness, let there be a light
Where two or more idiots are gathered together, try to reduce the number of idiots
12 Jul 2021 09:15 | 69
BOFH: Here in my car I feel safest of all. I can listen to you ... It keeps me stable for days
Yep, read the licence again
09 Jul 2021 08:30 | 88
BOFH: Oh for Pete’s sake. Don’t make a spectacle of yourself
Just close your eyes and pretend it’s not there. Before you know it, it’ll be the weekend
25 Jun 2021 09:15 | 63
BOFH: Despite the extremely hazardous staircase, our IT insurance agreement is at an all-time low. Can't think why
Why show them the door when a window will do?
11 Jun 2021 08:30 | 42
BOFH: I'm so pleased to be on the call, Boss. No, of course this isn't a recording
I was thinking to myself, 'This could be Heaven or this could be Hell'
04 Jun 2021 08:59 | 61
BOFH: But we think the UK tax authorities would be VERY interested in how we used COVID support packages
Or we could just all contract a little amnesia...
28 May 2021 08:30 | 52
BOFH: Postman BOFH's Special Delivery Service
Back to the office we trudge, dragging our hooked tails behind us
23 Apr 2021 10:01 | 97
BOFH: Bullying? Not on my watch! (It's a Rolex)
Aye, me hearties... it is time to call H-ARRRRRGH
26 Mar 2021 09:30 | 78
BOFH: 7 jars of Marmite, a laptop and a good time
Or 'How PFY and I do Access Control'
26 Feb 2021 10:25 | 88
BOFH: Are you a druid? Legally, you have to tell me if you're a druid
Er, I mean, droid. In the far reaches of the world, under a lost and lonely hill, lies the OFFICE OF NEVERMORE
22 Jan 2021 09:30 | 75
BOFH: Time for the MMOCC. You know, the Massively Moronic Online Christmas Call
This year, starring an utterly, er, empowering personal presence guru
25 Dec 2020 13:15 | 54
BOFH: Switch off the building? Great idea, Boss
Never mind what those blinkenlights are doing. Take a deep breath and this will all be fine
11 Dec 2020 09:30 | 106
BOFH: You might want to sit down for this. Oh, right, you can't. Listen carefully: THIS IS NOT AN IT PROBLEM!
Oh is that right? The crappy Chromebook is fine now?
13 Nov 2020 09:30 | 113
BOFH: Gosh, IPv5? Why didn't I think of that? Say, how do you like the new windows in here? Take a look. Closer...
No, no. There's no such thing as a stupid question
28 Feb 2020 09:15 | 72
BOFH: Darn Windows 7. It's totally why we need a £1k graphics card for a business computer
Look to the future, Boss – you know it makes sense
07 Feb 2020 09:14 | 101
BOFH: When was the last time someone said these exact words to you: You are the sunshine of my life?
It's survey time in BOFH-land... and the dastardly duo are getting creative
24 Jan 2020 11:12 | 103
BOFH: You brought nothing to the party but a six-pack of regret
A tale of Simon, the PFY and the consultant
10 Jan 2020 11:30 | 112
BOFH: The case of the Boss's hidden USB inkjet printer
A little life support from Simon and the PFY
30 Dec 2019 09:29 | 49
BOFH: 'Twas the night before Christmas, and the ransomware struck
If you don't cough the money, you're well out of luck
24 Dec 2019 10:00 | 63
BOFH: I'd like introduce you to a groovy little web log I call 'That's Boss'
You know what the kids will think is boss? You, tweeting from that window ledge
06 Dec 2019 10:14 | 117
BOFH: Trying to go after IT's budget again?
Ah, Director. Your childish antics warm my heart
22 Nov 2019 12:00 | 64
BOFH: Judge us not by the size of our database, but the size of our augmented reality
In which the PFY and Simon show the Director their vision of the future
25 Oct 2019 09:03 | 70
BOFH: The company survived the disaster recovery test. Just. The Director's car, however...
Well, it was an angry mob simulation
18 Oct 2019 12:32 | 99
BOFH: We must... have... beer! Only... cure... for... electromagnetic fields
Slow your roll, your typewriters will be here anon
27 Sep 2019 08:50 | 145
BOFH: What's the Gnasher? Why, it's our heavy-duty macerator sewage pump
It's also our nickname for the ISA card guy we have to pay to fix everything
20 Sep 2019 09:20 | 100
BOFH: Oh, go on, let's flush all that legacy tech down the toilet
Leads? Detective Bastard Operator From Hell has nothing to Go On
02 Aug 2019 08:02 | 107
BOFH: On a sunny day like this one, the concrete dries so much more quickly
Our hero and the Pimply Faced Youth valiantly bring pub o' clock closer for us all
05 Jul 2019 12:30 | 119
BOFH: What's Near Field Implementation? Oh, you'll see. Turn left here
The Bastard Operator From Hell continues to meet targets on his roadmap in the latest instalment
28 Jun 2019 10:56 | 79
BOFH: It's not just an awesome app, it'll look great on my Insta. . a. a. AAAARRRRRGGH
Time to take a custard pie, er, interface...
26 Apr 2019 11:02 | 107
BOFH: Tick tick BOOM. It's B-day! No we're not eating Brussels flouts...
The B stands for BOFH
29 Mar 2019 09:15 | 136
BOFH: Bye desktop, bye desk. Hello 'slab and a beanbag on the floor
On our hero sysadmin's watch? Not likely...
22 Feb 2019 12:57 | 56
BOFH: State of a job, eh? Roll the Endless Requests for Further Information protocol
And let's see how long he takes to crack
07 Dec 2018 09:10 | 88
BOFH: Give me a lever long enough and a fool, I mean a fulcrum and ....
Simon and PFY gamify the interface
23 Mar 2018 10:01 | 137
BOFH: Buttock And Departmental Defence ... As A Service
Say it with us: BADD-AAS
12 Jan 2018 11:32 | 74
BOFH: The trouble with, er, windows installs
The numbers don't lie...
24 Nov 2017 11:28 | 53
BOFH: But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the eeeeeeeeeeee-ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHH
10 Nov 2017 11:26 | 55
BOFH: Do I smell burning toes, I mean burning toast?
This is not a drill
27 Oct 2017 10:56 | 89
BOFH: Oh dear. Did someone get lost on the Audit Trail?
Our expenses? Same thing we've filed every year...
13 Oct 2017 12:10 | 63
BOFH: Come on, PFY, let's pick a Boss
Robot intelligence not there yet... but neither is Boss intelligence
29 Sep 2017 09:34 | 35
BOFH: We're only here because they said there would be biscuits
BOFH helps promote his company's 'Story' (if promote = bag of quicklime)
15 Sep 2017 11:21 | 58
BOFH: Oh go on. Strap me to your Hell Desk, PFY
Special tables with special chairs for special people
28 Jul 2017 08:00 | 77
BOFH: Putting the commitment into committee
Do we have an agenda? Why of course we do!
23 Jun 2017 11:07 | 119
BOFH: Halon is not a rad new vape flavour
Migrate data? If you're keen on seeing clouds...
16 Jun 2017 11:00 | 98
BOFH: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back
Fly, little bird, fly....
28 Apr 2017 11:25 | 90
BOFH: Elf of Safety? Orc of Admin. Pleased to meet you
Come right this way. The PFY doesn't bite... that hard
24 Feb 2017 11:31 | 101
BOFH: Password HELL. For you, mate, not for me
Letting go never felt so good
03 Feb 2017 10:05 | 129
BOFH: The Hypochondriac Boss and the non-random sample
Cherry-pickin'? You darn tootin!
25 Nov 2016 11:52 | 82
BOFH: The Idiot-ware Project and the Meaningless Acronym
We'll take you away from misery of Hell Desk
07 Oct 2016 11:48 | 52
BOFH: There are no wrong answers, just wrong questions. Mmm, really wrong ones
Boss, are you blushing?
30 Sep 2016 09:47 | 112
BOFH: The case of the suspicious red icon
Could it be a virus? Why, user, you should be head of IT. Yes, I said behead
16 Sep 2016 11:29 | 86
BOFH: Free as in free beer or... Oh. 'Free Upgrade'
Even printer salesmen get the blues
22 Jul 2016 11:00 | 139