Sysadmin's favorite collection of infallible utilities failed … foully
who, me? Unnecessary 'maintenance' turned into a fragging foul-up
Storage04 Dec 2023 | 55
Who, Me?
What is Who, Me?
Who, Me? is a weekly column in which our readers confess to catastrophes they created in the pursuit of IT excellence - and usually managed to get away with.
The column is a light-hearted look at the world of work and tech.
We're always open to new stories we can feature in Who, Me? If you have one to tell, drop an email to whome@theregister.com to anonymously own up to tech mess you caused.
IT sent the intern to sort out the nasty VP who was too important to bother with backups
Who, Me? Kid escaped from the executive suite without screwing things up
Personal Tech27 Nov 2023 | 90
Why have just one firewall when you can fire all the walls?
Who, Me? 'Support monkey' turned network isolation job into a banana skin
Networks20 Nov 2023 | 88
Bright spark techie knew the drill and used it to install a power line, but couldn't outsmart an odd electrician
Who, Me? Shocking problem turned out to be a frame-up
On-Prem13 Nov 2023 | 111
Shock horror – and there goes the network neighborhood
Who, me? Curious tech learned an important lesson about keeping a grip in tight situations
Offbeat06 Nov 2023 | 124
After nine servers he worked on failed, techie imagined next career as beach vendor
Who, Me? Sadly (?) that idyllic outcome didn't eventuate even after some very risky repairs
Software30 Oct 2023 | 50
BROADER TOPICS
That script I wrote three years ago is now doing what? How many times?
Who, Me? Whipping up a RAID repair nearly produced data doom
Storage23 Oct 2023 | 76
One door opens, another one closes, and this one kills a mainframe
Who, Me? The Reg brings you balanced coverage of retro-tech
Systems16 Oct 2023 | 108
Scripted shortcut caused double-click disaster of sysadmin's own making
Who, Me? Tech remembers why those safeguards were there there to start with
Software09 Oct 2023 | 108
Lost your luggage? That's nothing – we just lost your whole flight!
Who, me? Tech's second day on the job nearly saw his high-flying career grounded
Databases02 Oct 2023 | 97
No, no, no! Disco joke hit bum note in the rehab center
who, me? Techie tried to dunk on a co-worker, and found himself absolutely soaking wet
Offbeat25 Sep 2023 | 86
Chap blew up critical equipment on his first day – but it wasn't his volt
Who, Me? Where there’s smoke, there’s ire
On-Prem18 Sep 2023 | 120
Watt's the worst thing you can do to a datacenter? Failing to RTFM, electrically
Who, me? A subtle change to a vital piece of equipment almost derailed a major project
Systems11 Sep 2023 | 165
Sure, give the new kid and his MCSE power over the AS/400. What could possibly go wrong?
Who, Me? All he did was follow the example of the boss. And fail to foresee obvious consequences
On-Prem04 Sep 2023 | 76
Polishing off a printer with a flourish revealed not to be best practice
Who, Me? Tech's pride in his work fed a hungry mechanical monster
On-Prem28 Aug 2023 | 81
Lesson 1: Keep your mind on the ... why aren't the servers making any noise?
Who, Me? Quest for redundant cables almost resulted in a redundant techie
On-Prem21 Aug 2023 | 86
The price of freedom turned out to be an afternoon of tech panic
Who, Me? It can be so hard to tell one column from another in a spreadsheet. They all look the same
Software14 Aug 2023 | 79
Techie's quick cure for a curious conflict caused a huge headache
Who, Me? A PC is a PC is a PC, and by any other name would not have taken down the intranet
Personal Tech07 Aug 2023 | 77
Nobody would ever work on the live server, right? Not intentionally, anyway
Who, Me? Techie installing an upgrade did everything right. But the user was already wrong
Software31 Jul 2023 | 140
Linux lover consumed a quarter of the network
Who, Me? Penguins are OK with glaciers. Academics not so much
OSes24 Jul 2023 | 130
Network died, hard, during company Christmas party, leaving lone techie to fix it
Who, me? Yippee-ki-yay, other sockets!
Sysadmin Month17 Jul 2023 | 38
Turning a computer off, then on again, never goes wrong. Right?
Who, Me? Health service techie learns what happens when you brute-force a bureaucracy
Systems10 Jul 2023 | 172
Hacking a Foosball table scored an own goal for naughty engineers
Who, Me? Such a blatant offside the manager couldn't see a funny side
Personal Tech03 Jul 2023 | 80
Security? Working servers? Who needs those when you can have a shiny floor?
Who, Me? The root cause was a buffer error – but not the kind of buffer you're thinking of
On-Prem26 Jun 2023 | 119
Data cleanser did its job, but – oopsie! – also doubled customers' bills
Who, Me? As the customers lined up with pitchforks and burning brands, the question in the cleanup meeting was 'Who, me?'
Software19 Jun 2023 | 25
A toast to being in the right place at the right time
who, me? Techie went to investigate mysterious network dropouts, when the solution popped up
On-Prem12 Jun 2023 | 152
Fed up with slammed servers, IT replaced iTunes backups with a cow of a file
who, me? Pigs might fly before youngsters listened to IT instructions – so the IT manager made sure chickens came home to roost
Personal Tech05 Jun 2023 | 92
Seriously, boss? You want that stupid password? OK, you get that stupid password
Who, Me? Fed-up techie wields the magic of malicious compliance on his way out the door
Offbeat29 May 2023 | 100
Rigorous dev courageously lied about exec's NSFW printouts – and survived long enough to quit with dignity
Who, Me? Log files don't lie and in this case one nasty incident spoke to a far deeper malaise
Security22 May 2023 | 86
An important system on project [REDACTED] was all [REDACTED] up
Who Me? Luckily, [REDACTED] was there to save the day
Security15 May 2023 | 45
Owner of 'magic spreadsheet' tried to stay in the Lotus position until forced to Excel
who, me? Sometimes legacy systems must be preserved to safeguard a vital function. This was not one of those times
Software08 May 2023 | 124
Your security failure was so bad we have to close the company … NOT!
Who, Me? There are pranks, and savage pranks, and this prank when the CTO and HR ganged up on a very stressed techie
Security01 May 2023 | 48
Support chap put PC into 'drying mode' and users believed it was real
Who, Me? Who annoys auditors? It's like picking on alligators – it won't end well
Personal Tech24 Apr 2023 | 83
Student requested access to research data. And waited. And waited. And then hacked to get root
Who, Me? The punishment – Windows 98 administration chores – was far worse than the crime
Security17 Apr 2023 | 85
Pager hack faxed things up properly, again, and again, and again
Who, Me? Where else can you read a story that starts with a Wang hack and ends with a wedding?
Offbeat10 Apr 2023 | 81
Defunct comms link connected to nothing at a fire station – for 15 years
Who, Me? Realization they'd burned money for ages led to smoldering solution rather than angry conflagration
Networks03 Apr 2023 | 131
Botched migration resulted in a great deal: One for the price of two
Who Me? Moving premises can have all manner of hidden traps. Here's one to watch for
Networks27 Mar 2023 | 99
IT phone home: How to run up a $20K bill in two days and get away with it by blaming Cisco
Who, Me? Badly configured routers ended up costing a bundle
Networks20 Mar 2023 | 141
Techie wiped a server, nobody noticed, so a customer kept paying for six months
Who, me? A missed migration mitigated the mistake
On-Prem13 Mar 2023 | 90
Don't worry, that system's not actually active – oh, wait …
who, me? Fat-fingered admin escaped because the last false alarm was caused by a frozen pizza and a toaster oven
On-Prem06 Mar 2023 | 262
Backup tech felt the need – the need for speed. And pastries and Tomb Raider
Who, Me? Ignoring the manual led to near-failure of mission to escape with precious pile of verified DVDs
Storage27 Feb 2023 | 92
A tip for content filter evaluators: erase the list of sites you tested, don't share them on 100 PCs
Who, Me? The sysadmin who made this mistake just barely survived the NSFW backlash
Software20 Feb 2023 | 182
Learn the art of malicious compliance: doing exactly what you were asked, even when it's wrong
Who, Me? Smart-alec worker found a way to avoid nasty, boring jobs – by doing what he was told
Security13 Feb 2023 | 210
Eager young tearaway almost ruined Christmas with printer paper
Who, Me? In the age of tractor-fed printers and perforated paper, telling a junior to tear it up was close to negligence
On-Prem06 Feb 2023 | 99
Shag pile PC earned techies a carpeting from HR
Who, Me? Thankfully a veep with a sense of humor pulled the rug out
Personal Tech30 Jan 2023 | 48
Dear Stupid, I write with news I did not check the content of the [Name] field before sending this letter
Who, Me? This is what happens when database field names are changed without proper documentation
Software23 Jan 2023 | 104
Sysadmin infected bank with 'alien virus' that sucked CPUs dry
who, me? No good deed escapes scripting SNAFUs
On-Prem16 Jan 2023 | 68
Mixing an invisible laser and a fire alarm made for a disastrous demo
Who, Me? Dark deeds are no way to close a deal
Science09 Jan 2023 | 61
Meet the merry pranksters who keep the workplace interesting, if not productive
Who, Me? What to do with the boss who refuses to answer the phone? Or wants a bigger cubicle? Revenge, that's what
On-Prem26 Dec 2022 | 91
When we asked how you crashed the system we wanted an explanation not a demonstration
Who, Me? One dumb downtime-inducing panic is survivable. The second is a career-killer
Offbeat19 Dec 2022 | 110
Server installer fails to spot STOP button – because he wasn't an archaeologist
Who, me? Confoundingly camouflaged control covered in cruft confounds careful contractor, crashes kit
On-Prem12 Dec 2022 | 159
Programming error created billion-dollar mistake that made the coder ... a hero?
who, me? No crypto needed, just a project with a tough deadline that nobody minded missing
Software05 Dec 2022 | 192
How not to test a new system: push a button and wait to see what happens
Who, me? How to make an IBM engineer hyperventilate, or get a promotion: see above.
Systems28 Nov 2022 | 88
Job 1: Get the boss on the network. Job 2: Figure out why Job 1 broke the network for everyone else
Who, Me? Running a theme park Help Desk was a non-stop roller coaster ride, and not in a fun way
Networks21 Nov 2022 | 52
Just follow the instructions … no wait, not that instruction to lock everyone out of everything
Who, Me? When RTFM goes bad
On-Prem14 Nov 2022 | 164
Run a demo on live data? Sure! What could possibly go wrong? Hang on. Are you sure that's not working?
who, me? To quote the great philosopher Han Solo: Don't get cocky
Software07 Nov 2022 | 56
The boss worked in a fishbowl, so office tricks were a treat
Who, Me? Phones weren't made to fly
Personal Tech31 Oct 2022 | 111
Data loss prevention emergency tactic: keep your finger on the power button for the foreseeable future
Who, Me? When switches really were switches, one reader managed to avert a potential disaster
Systems24 Oct 2022 | 131
Loathsome eighties ladder-climber levelled by a custom DOS prompt
Who, Me? This wasn't WarGames – it was far more serious
Software17 Oct 2022 | 114
Tetchy trainee turned the lights down low to teach turgid lecturer a lesson
Who, Me? Sure, I’ll sit here all day taking notes because you’re too cheap to print them out
Personal Tech03 Oct 2022 | 119
Bad UI killed the radio star
Who, Me? Rules, it turns out, are not meant to be broken. Especially by the person who wrote the rule about how to protect data
Storage19 Sep 2022 | 44
Salesperson's tech dream delivered by ill-equipped consultant who charged for the inevitable fix
Who,Me? ‘I had a sharp new suit and a misplaced sense of confidence’ – and made a costly mistake
Channel05 Sep 2022 | 56
Biting the hand that feeds IT
