The UK's favourite lockdown cheese is Big and Red but doesn't require a stinking great audit after consumption
Curd is the word as bored Brits search options for cheese and wine nights in
03 Jun 2020 | 58
Bootnotes
The Edinburgh Fringe festival isn't happening this year, but that won't stop a digital sign doing its own comedy routine
Bork!Bork!Bork!Cowgate calamity befalls Windows-powered signage
03 Jun 2020 | 12
Building society caught in middle of high street sharing a little too much on TeamViewer
Bork!Bork!Bork!You say fintech, they say findom, let's call the whole thing BOFH
01 Jun 2020 | 21
Guess who came thiiis close to signing off a €102k annual budget? Austria. Someone omitted 'figures in millions'
'In Ihrem Budget fehlen sechs Nullen' warned MP
29 May 2020 | 49
VirtuaVerse: Cyberpunk point-and-click throwback with ace chiptune soundtrack put out by... a metal record label?
The RPGThe Reg speaks to Blood Music about its retrofuturistic love letter to the adventure game golden age
29 May 2020 | 12
Surprise! That £339 world's first 'anti-5G' protection device is just a £5 USB drive with a nice sticker on it
Colour us shocked
28 May 2020 | 215
Great success! Finance app was able to inform user that their action was unsuccessful
Bork!Bork!Bork!Not just a bunch of complete bankers
28 May 2020 | 13
While waiting for the Linux train, Bork pays a visit to Geordieland with Windows 10
Bork!Bork!Bork!Behold, the three error dialogs of the borkpocalypse
27 May 2020 | 28
You E-diot! Formula E driver booted off Audi team after getting video game ace to take his place in online race
Daniel Abt's career stalls after he struggled to shift from physical to virtual courses mid-pandemic
26 May 2020 | 23
Chicago: Why I just grin like a dork... It's my kind of Bork
Bork!Bork!Bork!Even the bus shelters of the windy city cannot escape the borkage
22 May 2020 | 46
Wanna force granny to take down that family photo from the internet? No problem. Europe's GDPR to the rescue
Grandchild Digital Picture Removal
22 May 2020 | 50
Hooray! It's IT Day! Let's hear it for the lukewarm mugs of dirty water that everyone seems to like so much
International Tea. The world isn't about to suddenly start appreciating you
21 May 2020 | 85
Berlin's renowned nightclub scene is showing signs of life. Just one problem: No dancing
Industry attempts pivot to beer gardens and pizza, but it's easy to recreate the vibe from the comfort of your own home
20 May 2020 | 20
Windows invokes Sgrîn Las Marwolaeth upon Newport
Bork!Bork!Bork!Apparently Welsh was not invented by Tolkien
19 May 2020 | 21
Doors closed by COVID-19, Brit retro tech museums need your help
This hack owes it all to a dalliance with a TMS9900 40 years ago. How about you?
18 May 2020 | 30
Huge if true... Trump explodes as he learns open source could erode China tech ban
The Register presents White House transcript obtained by Stealth Anti-Tracing Intelligence Remote Exfiltration
18 May 2020 | 122
Beer gut-ted: As many as '70 million pints' spoiled during coronavirus pandemic must be destroyed in Britain
UpdatedJeez, talk about bitter
16 May 2020 | 214
If you don't LARP, you'll cry: Armed fun police swoop to disarm knight-errant spotted patrolling Welsh parkland
Hey, he's not causing any harm, unlike Norfolk's plague doctor creep
15 May 2020 | 77
We're going underground, and this time it's not an inebriated banker crapping themselves, but Transport for London
Bork!Bork!Bork!Is that Jam on your XML? Or is it... oh no...
15 May 2020 | 16
Google says it'll pick up the tab – and stick it in a lovely colour-coded Chrome group
A desktop browser spring clean can do the soul a power of good
14 May 2020 | 19
Driveway karaoke singer who wanted to lift lockdown spirits cops council noise complaint
Can we have 'Shaddap You Face'* next?
13 May 2020 | 56
The Rise of The (Coffee) Machines: I need assistance. I think I'm running Windows. Send help
Bork!Bork!Bork!Isn't it cute when a coffee machine addresses you in the first person?
13 May 2020 | 110
It is unclear why something designed to pump fuel into a car needs an ad-spewing computer strapped to it, but here we are
Bork!Bork!Bork!I'll take two gallons of petrol, some wilted apology-flowers and a double dose of bork, please
11 May 2020 | 113
What do you call megabucks Microsoft? No really, it's not a joke. El Reg needs you
It is time. We need a new Regism and cannot go to the pub to think of one. Can you help?
07 May 2020 | 487
Serial killer spotted on the night train from Newcastle
Bork!Bork!Bork!Remember when all we had to complain about were crappy rail services?
07 May 2020 | 63
Twitter sticks a beak in, Clippy-style: Are you sure you want to set your account alight with that flame?
No, you still can't edit tweets
06 May 2020 | 26
Tom Cruise to increase in stature thanks to ISS jaunt? Now that's a mission impossible
Buddying up with wing man Elon
06 May 2020 | 29
Pew-pew woo-hoo! Hong Kong reopens video arcades shut by coronavirus lockdown
Other fun places also get to let people in again, just don't read the economic data before you go because that's no fun at all
06 May 2020 | 8
Baby Diesel? Little d'Artagnan? There is another child of Musk in the world
Play The Register's naming game for the kid who will definitely be getting an electric go-kart
05 May 2020 | 55
Salesforce chief Marc Benioff gets clear view of pandemic, 'new balance' from guru pal
CommentBe. Nice. To. People
04 May 2020 | 11
It looks like you want a storage appliance for your data centre. Maybe you'd prefer a smart card reader?
Bork!Bork!Bork!Beware the dead hand of the product categorisation bot
04 May 2020 | 38
As Brit cyber-spies drop 'whitelist' and 'blacklist', tech boss says: If you’re thinking about getting in touch saying this is political correctness gone mad, don’t bother
Whitehat and blackhat next?
02 May 2020 | 261
Browse mode: We're not goofing off on the Sidebar of Shame and online shopping sites, says UK's Ministry of Defence
Its servers merely record more HTTPS requests to Mail Online and Amazon than anywhere else
01 May 2020 | 49
Ride now, ride! Ride for ruin and the world's ending! Mount & Blade II: Bannerlord is here at last! Kind of
The RPGCrush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of your partner
01 May 2020 | 5
Google is a 'publisher' says Aussie court as it hands £20k damages to gangland lawyer
Chocolate Factory held liable for words on its website
30 Apr 2020 | 37
Lars Ulrich makes veiled threats of another Metallica album during web chat with Salesforce CEO Marc Benioff
You know what, Lars? We're OK
30 Apr 2020 | 63
