Bork!Bork!Bork!
Sure, your app is crap, but Windows won't tell. Promise
One billboard outside Blairsville, Georgia
22 Apr 09:15 | 8
Bootnotes
Bootnotes
From book shop to tat bazaar to cloud behemoth to grocer, what's Amazon up to now? Augmented-reality hairstyles
Curl up and dye, anyone?
21 Apr 12:01 | 9
Bootnotes
God bless this mess: Study says UK's Christian beliefs had 'important' role in Brexit
Church of England first left the European bloc in the 16th century
20 Apr 09:15 | 258
Bootnotes
Brit Salesforce exec Gavin Patterson becomes transfer target for controversial European Super League
Ex-BT boss is familiar with the football lifestyle – being paid millions for doing very little
19 Apr 19:30 | 19
Bootnotes
Home office setup with built-in boiling water tap for tea and coffee without getting up is a monument to deskcess
If only it had a built-in loo and pillow, then we could work 24/7
16 Apr 13:01 | 111
Something for the Weekend, Sir?
How not to apply for a new job: Apply for it on a job site
Watch as I channel my digital Yosser Hughes, violence included
16 Apr 09:15 | 98
Bootnotes
Pigeon fanciers in a flap over Brexit quarantine flock-up, seek exemption from EU laws
It won't fly. 'We are collateral damage'
15 Apr 16:33 | 179
Bootnotes
Listen, son... Monster trucks just aren't cool anymore. Real winners drive Tesla Roadsters
Matchbox goes green with sustainably produced toys based on electric cars
15 Apr 12:01 | 38
Bootnotes
UK's National Rail backs down from greyscale website tribute to Prince Phil after visually impaired users complain
Protip: Ad/tracker blockers. Use them (though not on The Reg)
12 Apr 11:15 | 63
Bootnotes
Is that... is that a piece of Unikitty? Remembering Skylab via the medium of Lego
Now to recreate re-entry with a short drop onto a hard floor
06 Apr 10:32 | 13
Bork!Bork!Bork!
I've got the power! Or have I? Uninterruptible Phone-disposal Stuffup
Remembering airports of the past and borked kiosks of today
01 Apr 10:10 | 34
Bootnotes
Mullet over: Aussie boys' school tells kids 'business in the front, party in the back' hairstyle is 'not acceptable'
A fine Australian tradition stomped on
31 Mar 11:34 | 110
Bootnotes
Cryptic US Strategic Command tweet reveals dangers of working from home with kids in the way
Was it a coded message? The password for accessing nukes? Nope
31 Mar 01:37 | 43
The RPG
Rogue elements: Hades and Loop Hero manage to draw on the same legacy while having very little in common
Let's go round again, maybe we'll turn back the hands of time
27 Mar 09:20 | 13
Something for the Weekend, Sir?
Diary of a report writer and his big break into bad business
Ow. Thank you sir may I have another
26 Mar 13:02 | 128
Bootnotes
NASA's Perseverance rover in brick form: China set vs unofficial Lego fan design
The Register goes a-building once more – no glue required this time
26 Mar 10:26 | 34
Bootnotes
Ticker tape and a binary message: Bank of England's new Alan Turing £50 must be the nerdiest banknote ever
Tribute to wartime computer boffin hits circulation on 23 June
25 Mar 13:17 | 89
Updated
Global tat supply line clogged as Suez Canal authorities come to aid of wedged 18-brontosaurus container ship
At last, The Reg online standards converter's time has come
24 Mar 16:23 | 71
Bootnotes
Prince Harry, the Count of Montecito, turns Silicon Valley startup exec with first job based in 21st Century
New post accepted as Chief Impact (on Press Coverage) Officer for BetterUp
23 Mar 21:41 | 58
Bootnotes
Sure, Dave might seem like he's avidly listening to this morning's meeting, but he's actually doing a yoga routine
Meanwhile, Emma is playing video games, and Daniel... well, Daniel is drunk already
23 Mar 17:48 | 39
Popular
Updated
University duo thought it would be cool to sneak bad code into Linux as an experiment. Of course, it absolutely backfired
'Our community does not appreciate being experimented on' says Kroah-Hartman
Science
China has a satellite with an arm – and America worries it could be used to snatch other spacecraft
Send more money to help us protect our space toys, military tells Congress
PaaS + IaaS
Microsoft revokes MVP status of developer who tweeted complaint about request to promote SQL-on-Azure
Programme members were asked to make noise ahead of Amazon Web Services conference
Science
Ah, you know what? Keep your crappy space station, we're gonna try to make our own, Russia tells world
Come 2025, we're Putin this collaboration to bed
Devops
Not saying you should but we're told it's possible to land serverless app a '$40k/month bill using a 1,000-node botnet'
CompSci trio describe theoretical Denial-of-Wallet attack
Personal Tech
We seem to have materialized in a universe in which Barney the Purple Dinosaur is designing iPhones for Apple
Is there a back button for reality?
Security
UK.gov wants mobile makers to declare death dates for their new devices from launch
IoT security plan suddenly thrusts into the mainstream
Updated
Signal app's Moxie says it's possible to sabotage Cellebrite's phone-probing tools with booby-trapped file
More a declaration of war than turning the tables
Offbeat
Lego's Space Shuttle Discovery: No trouble with Hubble, but the stickers will drive a grown man to insanity
The Reg once again shoves its talons into bags of spiky bricks for latest website-breaking set
Review
But can it run Avid? The Reg hands shiny new M1 MacBook to video production pro, who beats it with Bender, Handbrake, and ... Hypercard?
He was there the day Steve Jobs moved off PowerPC to Intel, and says the Arm transition looks better
STORIES
Bootnotes
Something fishy is going on in Taiwan as folk change name to include 'salmon' for free sushi
Youngsters rise to the bait after restaurant chain's promotion
18 Mar 13:14 | 36
Bootnotes
Security pro's time-travelling Twitter bot suspended after posting download link for Adobe Acrobat for MS-DOS
'This is of historical interest. Adobe isn’t really worried about this, it is automation'
16 Mar 18:45 | 33
Bork!Bork!Bork!
Burgers, birds, and Blue Screens of Death: Remember the joys of commuting?
Bork terminates at London Victoria
16 Mar 09:30 | 14
Reg Standards Bureau
Gummy bears as a unit of measure? The Reg Standards Soviet will not stand for this sort of silliness
Less than a fifth of a linguine, for goodness' sake – come on now
12 Mar 20:48 | 69
Bootnotes
Jailed Samsung boss accused of abusing Propofol aka ‘the milk of amnesia’ or 'the drug that killed Michael Jackson'
Cops probe vice chairman
12 Mar 01:40 | 17
Bootnotes
It's wild the lengths Facebook engineers will go to find new ways to show you inane ads about tat: This time, AR...
... and a lot of wrist action
11 Mar 06:30 | 30
BORK!BORK!BORK!
Delayed, overbudget and broken. Of course Microsoft's finest would be found in NASA's Orion
In Space No One Can Hear You Scream (as Windows crashes again)
08 Mar 11:02 | 44
Logowatch
What happens when cancel culture meets Adolf Hitler pareidolia? Amazon decides it needs a new app icon
Dodgy doppelganger not the first, won’t be the last
04 Mar 00:15 | 153
Bootnotes
Telecoms shack in the middle of Scotland put up for auction at £7,500
No broadband or bedroom though, so you'll have to sign up for sats or build your own
03 Mar 10:15 | 68
Bootnotes
Retro Microlympics concludes with possible reopening dates for UK computer museums
Vulture trounced at Revs and Elite, hopes to admire ancient kit in May
01 Mar 10:28 | 27
Bootnotes
Choose your fighter! March Mammal Madness pits poor, innocent critters against each other in mortal combat
Not literally and all in the name of education
26 Feb 23:01 | 25
The RPG
Valheim: How the heck has more 'indie shovelware with PS2 graphics' sold 4 million copies in a matter of weeks?
Now, this might shock you, but it's something we like to call 'fun' (if you have friends)
26 Feb 17:14 | 60
Bork!Bork!Bork!
Microsoft spearheads a whole new genre with installation on the side of a Lyon tunnel
Ah oui, mais est-ce de l'art?
24 Feb 09:31 | 41
Bootnotes
Robocall bagmen admit they collected millions of dollars from victims scammed by bogus IRS officials, lenders
Duo picked up sacks of cash sent via FedEx, UPS, USPS etc
24 Feb 01:52 | 9
Bork!Bork!Bork!
Look! Up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's just a very unhappy Windows installation
The last attempt to resume your country failed. Would you like to try again?
23 Feb 10:31 | 12
Offbeat
Healthy 32-year-old offered COVID-19 vaccine because doctors had him down as 6.2cm tall with BMI of 28,000
Bloke was placed into vulnerable category because of his weight
19 Feb 17:16 | 92
Something for the Weekend, Sir?
You want me to do WHAT in that prepaid envelope?
Not quite the data dump I thought you meant
19 Feb 10:29 | 111
Bootnotes
Has Amazon finally gone cuckoo? Bezos' behemoth turns to crowdfunding for Alexa-powered timepiece
If you 'Build It', they will come
18 Feb 11:15 | 32
Bootnotes
No egrets: Ardent twitchers fined for breaking lockdown after bloke spots northern mockingbird in his garden
'Don't give out the location!!'
16 Feb 13:27 | 49
