Promoting human rights is a waste of time, Sun Microsystems CEO Scott McNealy explained in a rambling speech at a National Press Club luncheon Thursday which would have brought tears of reverent joy to the eye of any Calvinist burgher.
"When people aren't at work, law enforcement agencies are busier, entitlement agencies are spending more money; people aren't getting educated and trained -- there's a whole bunch of bad things that happen when people aren't at work," he said.
Arbeit macht frei
Just look at the splendid example set by America, he suggested, for a working model of the Third World Utopia to come.
"Most people in the United States are at work right now, and that's a good thing because people, when they're at work, are too tired to shoot guns off in the wrong place or do bad things. They're paying taxes instead of being on entitlement programmes. And when they're at work, they're typically getting trained."
So we've all got to "go after" expanding NAFTA and trade with China, "and we've got to not let the human rights and environmental issues clobber the opportunity to make everybody on both sides of the border better off."
"It's not theory; it's not anecdotal; it is flat out, 'free trade helps everybody.' And it will help the environment, and it will help the human rights issues. That's a big one that everybody's got to get involved in and push very, very hard."
McNealy also demonstrated his profound ignorance of national economics by questioning the Federal Reserve's interest-rate hikes in a blunt, all-or-nothing fashion.
"Why would you raise interest rates when unemployment is at a low level?" he asked rhetorically. "Isn't that a good thing?" (It's done to exert downward pressure on the cost of labour.)
"Why would you raise interest rates when you see wages rising? Isn't that a good thing?" (See above.)
"Why would you raise interest rates when you see GNP accelerating?" (To keep expansion at a rate which can be maintained.)
"Why, when the stock market is doing well, would you raise interest rates?" (To discourage mass margin buying, which can transform a market contraction into a full-blown crash.)
Admittedly, with the gift of hindsight we can argue that Greenspan ought to have raised rates earlier than he did, and then cut them earlier too; but there are in fact solid reasons for his actions, though the implementation could certainly have been better.
"I just don't understand Fed policy," McNealy explained.
McNealy also stumped for Dubya's proposed gigantic $1.6 trillion tax cut, which is based on a projected federal revenue surplus.
"We don't have a surplus, we have an overcharge," he quipped. "We need to get discretionary spending back into the hands of individuals."
Let's forget for the moment that the nation's plutocrats, like McNealy himself, and the corporations they nurture, will be the chief beneficiaries of this noble undertaking.
Let's also forget that in order to establish the urgent need for this scheme, President Bozo has been talking the most appalling FUD to the country, in efforts to persuade everyone that a recession is underway and a tax break is its only possible solution.
Ironically, a major engine of recession is a loss of consumer confidence and subsequent mass closing of wallets and deferment of consumerist lust. Thus by continually sowing doubts about the economy to justify his tax package and bleating about a recession, the Halfwit-in-Chief is in fact inviting one.
"A warning-light is flashing on the dash-board of our economy, and we can't just drive on and hope for the best," Dubya said during a Rose-garden speech Thursday where he touted his tax revolution.
An apt metaphor indeed, as motor mechanics call these gizmos 'idiot lights.' They give great comfort to the multitudes who find it impossible to interpret the confusing data supplied by such mechanical exotica as coolant-temperature and oil-pressure gauges.
McNealy collaborated obediently, and at roughly the same time, affirming the need for just such a scheme. Otherwise, "CEOs around the world are gonna try and figure out how many folks they can fire. And then you've got a real problem," he warned.
"We've really got to figure out how to keep everybody at work. That's what makes everything happen in a positive way," he chirped inanely.
So be glad and rejoice; Utopia is just around the corner. The entire world will soon be fat, dumb and happy, gleefully consuming superfluous rubbish, and far too exhausted from endless hours slaving in the workplace to do wrong.
Sounds great. We just wonder what will happen if Dubya and his corporate boosters do in fact talk America into a recession, but fail to get the all-redeeming tax package through Congress. ®